Red Cards and Clerical Errors

By: Daryl | March 25th, 2009

vs Hamburg (away)

Champions League 3rd Qual Rnd, 2nd Leg (3-0 on agg)

It took Fan Bo exactly 54 seconds to score his first goal for Newcastle. Nothing fancy, just a tap in after Lewandowksi squared it. But he’s off the mark already.

Sadly, it took John Fleck just eight minutes to get himself sent off for a two footed tackle. So I spent the rest of game playing either 4-4-1 or 4-2-2-1 (essentially 4-2-3 with two centre mids, two attacking wingers and one striker). We got out of there with a 1-1 draw though, and a spot in the Champions League proper.

Result: 1-1 (4-1 on agg). Ker. Ching.

Gave Fleck a warning about his red card, and he’s promised to try not slicing opposition players in half next time.

vs Portsmouth (home)

Apparently Arshavin is in competition with Fleck to see hwo can get sent off the quickest. The little Russian chopped down Nicko Krankjar in the fifth minute and got his marching orders. So it was back to 4-2-2-1, but without giving up on attacking.

Weirdly, Portsmouth left new signing Mascio (now a wonderkid) on the bench and didn’t manage a shot at goal despite the one man advantage. You may or may not be surprised to hear that Tony Adams is still in charge.

The deadlock was broken in the 51st, when Bertrand (still looking good) crossed and Jonas knocked it in.

Result: 1-0

Fan Bo is away with the China U-23 team, where he just scored four goals vs Cambodia U-23s. The Newcastle accountants are salivating at the amount of Fan Bo Newcastle jerseys we’re going to sell in China.

The Champions League group stages have been drawn. We were seeded second, and drawn into Group D with Inter, Anderlecht and AaB:

Now for the bad news. The FM Gods have noticed my massive squad, and decided it needs to take a beating. So while away on international duty, Fabricio Coloccini has twisted his ankle and is out for two weeks, while Ignacio Camacho has had a toe broken “in a training session” and is going to miss two whole months. What are Spain doing in national training sessions? Playing the old hammer vs toe game? Hammer wins every time.

But no worries, I’ve got Miguel Veloso, right? Well, sort of. He’s just coming back from a two week layoff himself, and – administrative snafu – he’s already player for Sporting Lisbon in the Champions League qualifiers, which makes him ineligible for this season. I shout at the tea lady, even though it’s clearly my fault.

vs Chelsea (away)

It’s no secret that things are going well. But this was just ridiculous. Lewandowski headed home a Bertrand (who was released by Chelsea over the summer) cross after 18 minutes, the Pog headed a second after 36 and fired in a rocket after 39. 3-0 at half-time.

Veloso was only half-fit (started with 89% condition) but did a job for an hour. The Pog looked absolutely unstoppable and Bertrand must be making Jose Enrique nervous.

Result: 3-1

That keeps me top after four games.

Next up, we’re at home to Jose Mourinho’s Inter Milan in my first Champions League group game. Pretty much the same Inter as now, except that Mario Balotelli is 21 (and dangerous) and they just signed Alexis Sanchez fromm Udinese.

I would have been confident, but Camacho is out and Veloso ineligible, which means 17 year old Lars Lien needs to step up.